Last night as I was counting down till midnight with friends in Rosebud, not to see in the New Year, but till I could go to bed and get away from the goobery sloppy kisses, I told everyone that I was going to lock myself in the toilet just before midnight. They were horrified, 'you can't do that' they moaned. At 11.57 pm I snuck off to the loo, but I got caught and they shouted that I had to come out, so I came out, kissed everyone, got my keys and went home with old buddies Corny and Lorraine to their house for the night. I think we ran to our beds and snuggled down, well Corny couldn't run, Mr Clumsy with his two hip replacements got tangled in his plastic chair and fell and hit his head on the steel poles (he warned everyone else to look out for them)and twisted his back as he was hurrying to turn up the radio when AC/DC came onto whatever old bastard golden oldies station we were listening too.
This morning we received a call from the party which was still rockin' with a fresh bottle of top shelf something or rather, asking us to return. Feeling bright eyed, I smugly sat in the sunshine and enjoyed New Years morning with my friends. And just to be even more annoying, I stacked chairs, binned rubbish, wiped tables, (spilled red wine is an excellent glass cleaner) and even did all the dishes in the laundry trough. Someone remarked that I must be a cleanliness freak. Yeah right, ask my mum about that. She says I am a disgusting filthy pig. Just because she gets out in the street,in a t-shirt with baggy or no knickers and bum up in the air, scrubs the gutter with a toothbrush because her drains are blocked. And my mum can hear snails eating her plants under her bedroom window at night and goes out on a snail killing mission. But this post isn't about her.
A Polish lady I used to work with was always very particular about what she did on New Year's day, she said it set the scene for the whole year. So maybe this is the new me! Sober and clean. Oink oink.
